How to use Gender-Inclusive Language

“Guys”. How many times have you used this word to address a group of people regardless of their gender? We’ve all done it, both in the workplace and in our personal lives. English commonly uses masculine nouns and pronouns when the gender is unknown or when referring to both sexes, and much of the language we use every day doesn’t include those who don’t identify as male or female. How we address people has the power to exclude or favor particular groups, and using gender-inclusive language can help us avoid just that.

The way people see themselves and how they experience gender usually starts developing in early childhood and is known as gender identity. If their gender identity doesn’t match their biological sex or doesn’t fit a traditional gender category, people may change the names and pronouns used to refer to themselves. By using gender-sensitive language, which is believed to be the most inclusive form of language, instead of exclusionary or gender-neutral language, we avoid bias and discrimination against a particular sex or gender identity and promote equality and diversity. 

While there is growing awareness of this issue, it can be challenging to navigate the unconscious bias hidden in the language we use in our day-to-day to address colleagues and members of our community. So, how do you incorporate gender-inclusive language? Here are some strategies to help you get started. 

1. If gender is unknown and not relevant …

If gender is not relevant to the conversation, don’t mention it. By using traditional gender norms and by assuming a male perspective we create an unwelcome and unsafe environment. Using “They” instead of “He” or “She” when referring to someone whose pronouns are unknown or irrelevant has become much more common as it avoids misgendering or highlighting someone’s gender when it is not relevant to the conversation.  

Here are some other ways you can refer to someone when gender is unknown or irrelevant.  

1. avoid the generic masculine form
   • use gender-inclusive titles → firefighter instead of fireman
2. avoid a male-only and heterosexual perspective → “employees and their partners” instead of “employees and their spouses” and “staff the desk” instead of “man the desk”
3. highlight people’s qualities rather than their gender when referring to their situation and achievements 
4. avoid labels that limit any gender → “she handled it like a man”
5. avoid gender pronouns (“he” or “she”) when the gender is unknown
   • rephrase to avoid pronouns, you can repeat the noun or use the word “person” or use “they” → “We need to hire a designer, that person will be critical for the project” or “We need to hire a designer, they will be critical for the project”, instead of “We need to hire a designer, he will be critical for the project”
   • use passive voice (“A feedback form must be submitted” instead of “Every participant must submit his feedback form”)
   • use pronoun “who” → “Any participant who wants to ask a question can do so in the Q/A session” instead of “If a participant wants to ask a question, he can do so in the Q/A session”
   • use imperative → “Submit your proposal as soon as possible” instead of “He should submit his proposal as soon as possible”

2. If gender is known and/or relevant …  

There are instances when gender may be relevant and you may in fact know the gender of the person you are addressing or referring to. There are ways to promote equality and respect gender identity even when acknowledging gender:

1. avoid mentioning looks, clothes, and parenthood 
2. avoid gender-coded words such as competitive, decisive, courageous for men, collaborative, dependable, and patient for women. 
3. use “her/his” and “he/she” in alphabetical order

3. Never assume, just ask

Sometimes you will not know the gender of the person you are talking about or talking to as gender identity is not visible to others. Don’t guess, ask! Always be respectful when trying to learn more about someone’s gender identity and make sure they are comfortable sharing this information with you. You can create a safe and welcoming environment by stating your pronouns when introducing yourself in a meeting and encouraging others to do the same. This way others feel comfortable sharing their pronouns and you can address them appropriately. 

4. Respect and incorporate change 

While for some gender identity remains the same throughout their lives, for others, it can change over time. As people’s gender identity changes, so should the way you address and talk about them. Sometimes you may be aware of the changes, other times you may have to ask to be sure. Your willingness to acknowledge and follow up on these changes will confirm your commitment to a welcoming and safe environment.

5. If you make a mistake

If you make a mistake, acknowledge it and correct yourself. While taking responsibility for an error is the best way to make the other person feel visible and move forward, it is also important not to make a big deal out of it. Over-apologizing can make the other person uncomfortable as they suddenly become the focal point of the conversation.

6. Create your own best practices

There are plenty of guidelines out there aimed to improve the way we refer to all individuals as we try to unlearn the everyday use of gendered-focused language. You can use them as your starting point as you seek to grow your understanding of gender-inclusive language and incorporate it into your everyday life. 

These are some of the questions you can ask yourself:

• Do I often assume the gender of the person I am addressing?
• Do I often mention someone’s gender? Is it always necessary to do so?
• Do I use occupational stereotypes? 
• Do I ever use the word “man” to refer to a person who may be female?